What If I Told You Failure Isn't Real?

Have you ever completely bombed, and it made you feel like a total failure? Maybe you had a setback, or faced a challenge that just seemed insurmountable? What if I told you failure isn’t real. It’s the product of a bunch of jumbled up beliefs with an overgeneralized label slapped on it, and more importantly, it’s not useful. Thinking about the things we work towards in this way, hinders us from seeing the stepping stones we’ve created AND developing a mindset that allows us to be resilient.

When I was a teacher, I encountered students who had slipped through the proverbial cracks of language arts education. Sometimes they struggled with reading comprehension, others writing, and many times both. If we had a student who was a couple years behind, sometimes we could get them caught up in a year, but if we had a student who was four years behind, they didn’t fail because they weren’t reading at grade level, or writing five paragraph essays by the end of the year. In fact, moving them forward two years is a huge success. They just have to continue.

The way we think about success and failure is too finite. What would happen if that student had been told that they only had until the end of the year to catch up, and that was it? Failure is only permanent if we stop trying, and most of the time success is right around the corner.  We just have to learn about what we have done, and decide if we have to change anything, even if it’s just the deadline, and then keep going. Sometimes there’s a lot more that needs to be changed. Having the mindset to reflect on what’s been done and recognize adjustments that can be made is one of the most useful tools anyone can carry through life.

This is what we call a “growth mindset”. In any part of our lives where we face challenges, if we have the ability to step back, and decide what changes would be most likely to change the outcome, we learn, and we move on.

If you know me IRL, you know that I had a major setback this year. I had an injury that laid me up all summer, and the pain made it hard to sleep or concentrate on much of anything. All of the goals that I had for the summer had to be pushed off. I won’t lie, I was not in a happy space, and for the first month I vacillated between depressed and angry. When I started to reach the end of my time in a cast, I started to reconfigure my original plan for my rebrand. I’ve hit even more bumps along the way, but I’m still here. Reflecting, learning, and growing.

Over the course of my life, I can pinpoint times when I was paralyzed by the thought of failing. By changing my MO, and embracing a growth mindset, I see every new challenge as an opportunity. Temporary setbacks are, well, temporary. So, the next time you encounter a challenge, take a deep breath and remind yourself that failure isn't real. Instead, see it as a chance to learn, grow, and ultimately achieve your goals.

Love and Light,

Maria